Friday, July 24, 2009
F-R-I-D-A-Y
Time really passes fast. Another week is gone and just a week, I am at my dad's wake.. Now in my house.. It seems so empty.. The agruement voices, irritating noise and disturbing moments are all gone.. It is really gone in a snap moment.. The day my dad hospitalized till the day he left us.. I felt so empty..
I felt so lost in everything. My time seems to stop at the moment my dad collapsed.. I tried to recall memories of earlier part of this year.. I couldn't remember.. I tried to call but I realized, I had forgotten most of the numbers and my brain is just an empty shell..
Today at work, my boss didn't give me much pressure.. She was always there to console me and I am glad to have good colleagues and bosses.. She didn't expect me to OT coz she said I should spend more time with my mum. I really appreciate her understanding..
There are way too many disappointing moments in life this year.. Hailey came visit me at night.. We chatted a little.. Hmm.. Sorted out my thoughts about some stuff and I realized I observe quite a lot things which made me unhappy. Thoughts of saying was become silent as I find it pointless as in return was retailiation from the person by finding things to say.. It will be a no ending thing.. Some people who will listen and mend but some chose to retailiate. So after a few conversations, I realized its really pointless for me to say.. Hailey knows who I am talking about..
Chatted with A.T on msg and he is also having probs at work. He felt bored.. Hmm.. Another week more, his office is moving to Loyang. It will be a freaking far journey for him.. He had tons of work to do.. But for him, in his current work place had no prospect left for him. He intend to leave but economy is bad.. He decided to stay on.. At least his boss didn't give him much pressure so far.. But his probs is way too many for me to understand.. All I could do was listen.. But that's what he said is enough for him.. But he is still the jovial person around me in order to let me smile..
Hmm.. Its late.. I think I should sleep.. If not A.T would be rumbling in my ears for sleeping late.. Haha.. Hmm.. I miss my dad.. Mum asked me whether will I celebrate my birthday next year.. Memories of dad just came.. Moments of us celebrating every birthday together since I was a kid.. Then I told mum, it would be a pain next year as I am celebrating alone without dad.. She said, if that's the case dun celebrate and dun remember the date so that u won't feel pain.. Anyway I have no intention to remember the dates anymore.. I totally lose interest in celebrating any occasions.. Somemore my life loses its sparkles as I really dunno what to do.. Where I am heading.. I am Lost.. Although today is friday which is the day I always look forward to coz its near weekends. Now everything seems so dark..
| 爱好 |
| 达成 |