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Friday, July 31, 2009

WeeKend & Lots to Do

Another week passed and I hardly get any sleep.. YES I MISS MY DAD..

Hmm.. House as usual like as though he went overseas but this is worst as I know he won't be back to life anymore. I dreamt of my dad a few nights, he seems so closed to me and I can feel him.. Roar.. This proves I have not gotten over the leaving of my dad to another world..

Well yesterday after work, I went to meet mum at Clementi and bused to Jurong East to meet Cheng. Then we walked around IMM. Bought lan cable as Cheng buying desktop this sun and we looking at sofa..

Hmm.. Nothing caught our eye at IMM so we brought mum to eat Pepper Lunch as she never eat before.. Hmm.. I tried the Sukiyaki.. Its damn nice.. Hehe.. Then after that we took a bus down to Trade Hub 21.. Went to one of the furniture shop there, the service given is freaking good.. We look and browse.. Both mum and Cheng like a particular sofa.. So they pointed out to me.. I tried and its really comfy.. So we settled in getting it.. Did the order and paper work.. Paid S$426.93 (Inclusive GST and Delivery). Not bad price.. Hehe.. Settled for the delivery date 2 weeks from now.. Hehe..

Cheng and me continued browsing at cupboards, coffee table and tv console but we have not decide to buy due to that's not urgent but sofa is high time to change as its really freaking old, older than me definitely.. From old house till this house.. Wonder what's the history behind.. Lol.. Too bad my grandma is no longer around, if not I have more stories to hear.. Hee..

For tomorrow there more paper works for my dad stuff and renovating my house.. How I wish got someone to help but I dun wanna ask AT as he is busy with moving of his office and he is given a huge responsibility on that..

Hmm.. Back to personal feelings.. Lately I stray far from certain people and talk lesser. Reason which shall not be disclosed.. Hmm.. I also discovered that when my dad left me and my grandma left me is totally different. I don't feel so much when Ah Ma left but when dad left, its beyond words. Its like how much I wished I could have spend more time with him instead of just this 8 years of memories. But the memories of when I able to remember things till the day, my Ah Ma breathe her last was none due to I seldom sees my dad home.. When he is home, I am in bed or I have the nasty memories of him creating a scene at home..

Life is really unpredictable.. The day before he is ok, the next day he fallen.. Totally made me dunno how to accept this freaking fact that my dad to depart from this world without a word.. I was quite shocked, disappointed and devastated.. All this is what I am feeling when the day my dad went into coma and passed on.. I totally never imagine or expecting things would turn out so fast.. Well I think I will take things slowly.. Mood is still rather off track but trying my best to be back on track.. Going to work also damn moody.. Like kinda no sense of direction in life for a sudden.. But I know I will get over it after a period.. For now, I will still keep my dad in my heart and memories..

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:08

Monday, July 27, 2009

Dazed

Today and tomorrow on mc.. Hmm.. Today went to cancel my dad's POSB account and went marketing with my mum.. Then home to rest and relax.. Mum was preparing dinner..

Yesterday met GJ and JJ at Harbourfront.. Hmm.. JJ ate in a hushed and rushed off.. Left GJ and me.. We went Daiso as I wanna see some stuff for mending drilled holes in wall and GJ wanna get food stuff.. I couldn't find what I want.. So waited for GJ to check out at the counter and we went ViVo Mart.. Hmm.. Got only the Silicon for the wall on Gaps. Then went Self-Fix to get cement and pad lock as I wanna change my house pad lock..

After gotten the stuff, we headed home.. I got home, bro was still busy with packing the living room.. I helped him a little.. Then we rested and waited for mum to be home. Mum came home with Aunt Martha.. We had dinner then awhile later, Aunt Martha went home..

Tomorrow since is another rest day, I intend to bring my mum to JB.. Well.. Since I got the time, I try to accompany her.. Today not much thing.. Weather was cool for relax and its raining.. I like raining days a lot although I am afraid of lightning.. Lol..

Talked to Henry and GJ on MSN.. Talked to Henry more as we were watching TV.. Haha.. Then we chatted about work and stuff.. Lol.. Its been long we chatted on msn.. Lol.. Well we leading different life now.. Somehow we are still close friends and the distance not that far apart.. I am glad that nothing had drawn us far.. We still have common topics and interest..

Hmm.. AT is freaking funny.. I am fine la dude.. Dun have to worry.. I maybe over exhausted that's why feel fatigue and got giddy.. After a 2 days rest, I will be fine ya.. Hee.. Hope yr moving of office this weekend will be fine.. ^^

Into A World of Emptiness @ 20:45

Saturday, July 25, 2009

I Miss My Dad

Today packed my dad stuff.. Tears welled up and not long awhile, I went to take my nap. Around 6pm, I woke up.. Mum told me, Aunt Martha asked us out for dinner. Bro going to meet his friend to watch movie so he not joining us..

Bathed and prepared to go out.. Cabbed down to Killney Road.. Went for porridge buffet.. Had my filled.. How I wished I could bring my dad along.. I have yet bring him to try the delicacies in SG.. I mean food I tried and felt its nice..

After our food, went to walk around NTUC at Killney.. Imagine NTUC around Orchard.. Lol.. After that mum and Aunt Martha check out at the counter.. Its time to head home.. Mum and me bused home while Aunt Martha trained home..

Hmm.. I couldn't find anyone to give the bicycle to.. I do not want to give it to my dad's friend as I won't be able to see the bike again.. At least its with my friend, I am still able to see.. Well maybe I have to let go of it.. Clinging it on makes me feel worst. Bro suggest I sell it away.. Hmm.. Maybe after I took some of the things I want then sell away ba.. Although I couldn't bear to do it. But no choice unless I sell away mine but I prefer my bicycle than my dad's..

Mum said I didn't have enough rest and she noticed my dark rings.. At night, its been really hard to sleep.. I have been so used to my dad being around.. Now totally is so different.. Just a night and the next day, everything seems so weird.. I know I have to adapt to it.. Especially every morning, I would greet my dad and now I am greeted with cold wind in the morning..

Its been a torture in me to accept the fact my dad went home.. But its way too sudden.. I checked my com.. The last birthday I celebrated with my dad was last year.. This year there's no celebration.. Why do I said that.. Because whenever we celebrate birthday, we will take a pic of it.. I feeling remorseful for not spending quality time with him this year.. But I bought his fave snacks back from JB and that's the last he ate before he collapsed.. I felt happy but he nagged me for spending money.. I knew his good intention but I know his favourites too.. :)

Alright I shall post the pic we took on Our Birthday on 03.04.2008.








Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:45

Friday, July 24, 2009

F-R-I-D-A-Y

Time really passes fast. Another week is gone and just a week, I am at my dad's wake.. Now in my house.. It seems so empty.. The agruement voices, irritating noise and disturbing moments are all gone.. It is really gone in a snap moment.. The day my dad hospitalized till the day he left us.. I felt so empty..

I felt so lost in everything. My time seems to stop at the moment my dad collapsed.. I tried to recall memories of earlier part of this year.. I couldn't remember.. I tried to call but I realized, I had forgotten most of the numbers and my brain is just an empty shell..

Today at work, my boss didn't give me much pressure.. She was always there to console me and I am glad to have good colleagues and bosses.. She didn't expect me to OT coz she said I should spend more time with my mum. I really appreciate her understanding..

There are way too many disappointing moments in life this year.. Hailey came visit me at night.. We chatted a little.. Hmm.. Sorted out my thoughts about some stuff and I realized I observe quite a lot things which made me unhappy. Thoughts of saying was become silent as I find it pointless as in return was retailiation from the person by finding things to say.. It will be a no ending thing.. Some people who will listen and mend but some chose to retailiate. So after a few conversations, I realized its really pointless for me to say.. Hailey knows who I am talking about..

Chatted with A.T on msg and he is also having probs at work. He felt bored.. Hmm.. Another week more, his office is moving to Loyang. It will be a freaking far journey for him.. He had tons of work to do.. But for him, in his current work place had no prospect left for him. He intend to leave but economy is bad.. He decided to stay on.. At least his boss didn't give him much pressure so far.. But his probs is way too many for me to understand.. All I could do was listen.. But that's what he said is enough for him.. But he is still the jovial person around me in order to let me smile..

Hmm.. Its late.. I think I should sleep.. If not A.T would be rumbling in my ears for sleeping late.. Haha.. Hmm.. I miss my dad.. Mum asked me whether will I celebrate my birthday next year.. Memories of dad just came.. Moments of us celebrating every birthday together since I was a kid.. Then I told mum, it would be a pain next year as I am celebrating alone without dad.. She said, if that's the case dun celebrate and dun remember the date so that u won't feel pain.. Anyway I have no intention to remember the dates anymore.. I totally lose interest in celebrating any occasions.. Somemore my life loses its sparkles as I really dunno what to do.. Where I am heading.. I am Lost.. Although today is friday which is the day I always look forward to coz its near weekends. Now everything seems so dark..

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:30

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Back to Work

Finally back to work.. Things had been so different when dad not around. I had to make decisions and a lot of things really freaking hard. I am sure I can do it since dad trust me so much.

Lately my friends are asking me a lot whether I got bf is it. The answer is no. If got will tell u all de la.. Ya maybe u all are right, if I have a bf at least I won't feel so lost and empty. But that's beside the point.

How should I put it.. I temp have not found a guy, I could really spend my life with. Ya what I am looking at is settling down. I thought I could settle down but somehow things dun go the way it should be. Sad is what I could say but for the time being, I putting relationship matters aside.

Recently, I also start to lose faith with what people say and I would take their words as not important. A few of my friends are being into this category. I dun wanna name them. I dun think I wanna believe what they say as they disappoint me quite a number of times le. Alright, its kinda late and tml is another day. I gonna get use to living without my dad. Argh.. Now when I need advise, I wonder who could I turned to. I know, I have not forgotten A.T

He is also my next advisor apart from my dad. Haha..

Into A World of Emptiness @ 22:30

Monday, July 20, 2009

The Funeral Day

Today was the last I could see my dad before we were off to Mandai Crematorium. Looking at dad for the last. Tears welling up inside of me. I tried not to cry.

Rituals were done before we set off.. Reached Mandai at 3pm. Did a last ritual. Then off we go to the viewing gallary, which is where we will see my dad body being cremate. I told myself I got to be strong.

Bid goodbye to dad when his coffin is approaching near. My bro pulled me near to see as I standing aside where I dun see the fire. But when I was pulled to stand to face the fire. My heart welled up in pain. I couldn't hold my tears anymore and I cried.

Daddy I am unable to see u anymore apart looking at u in the photo. I didn't regret to have to ask u to have a family photo taken this year during CNY. I will always deeply remember the moments we spent.

Lastly, I would like to thank the people who sent my dad on his last journey. They are:

Uncle Bok Chai & Wife
Uncle Kim San and Wife
Aunt Sai Gin
Aunt Irene & Husband
Aunt Martha
Cousin Danny
Cousin Anthony
Cousin Jennifer
Cousin Catherine
Cousin Madeline
Cousin Beng
Cousin Kenji
Henry
Grace
Yong Xin
Ronald
Jian Mei
Uncle Derrick (Dad's friend)
Uncle Vincent (Dad's friend)
Neighbours of Jalan Berseh
Zhong Hui (my bro's friend) and
Boon (my bro's friend)

Thank you for sending my dad on his last journey. Henry thanks for being there to comfort me and support when I am down. Thanks for letting me know that u are always there when I need a comforting shoulder to lie on.

A.T, thanks for showing me concern all this while though u couldn't make it. But your calls and msg is way enough for me. Although u are not there but u make it a point to msg or call me to make sure I am fine. Dun have worry dude. I am fine.. But thanks ya..

JJ and ZQ, thanks for visiting my dad at the wake and hospital. Really thank you to see that both of u care so much. I am deeply touched.

Hui Min, Patricia, Grace, Karen, Chew Hau, Joyce, Moko, Liang, May, Pei Pei and Catherine, thanks for your understanding and helping me this 2 weeks for my work. Really appreciate lots. Will join u all back in work soon. (They are Jason's Peeps)

Lastly, I wanna say through this period.. I finally sees what type of friends are true. But losing a dad is a painful moment. I need time to get by. I will be strong as my mum needs me. Another 2 more days of rest and settling of stuff before I head back to work.

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:12

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Daddy Left Me on 16 July 2009

Today (16 July 2009 , 闰五月二十四日, 7.35pm, my dad breath his last. My mum, bro and me stood by him with my relatives till his last heart beat. Although I couldn't bear to see my dad go without saying good bye to us.

Its really a sudden to us that my dad left. He had been in coma for days. Today morning we decided to take out the tube and let him breath naturally but we didn't expect that a change of ward would cause him to lose his life.

I regretted for not celebrating birthday with my dad this year. I regretted that I worked OT the day before he collapsed. I really regretted. I merely spent 8 years of my time with my dad as the first 16 years was with my grandma. But this 8 years is a fruitful one. I will never forget. I rebel against him. My dad turned more understanding towards bro and me. He opens up and talks more to us. I am glad for his changes but why now he has to leave us.

For nights, I couldn't really sleep.. I miss my dad. Although he is in hospital, we went back home to rest but my eyes just couldn't shut. My mind just wanders.. Daddy, I will always keep u in my memories. May the road in front for your next journey in another world be peace.

Daddy, I promised I will take good care of mum. Dun need to worry. But I am really not use to without u at my side giving me the assurance and secure. I have to be frank, I am living in fear when the doc pronounced that u are no longer with us.

Into A World of Emptiness @ 19:35

Monday, July 13, 2009

Doc gives 2 Option

Went to hospital after a rest at home.. Doc spoke to us at around 2pm as she was making her grand rounds on monday..

She said my dad didn't really show any good signs even though his body have some muscle reflexes.. She gave us 2 option which made us really difficult to choose..

1st option is to let him breathe by himself without the machine help and it will depend on how much he wanna live and the time maybe short as his breathing having difficulty..

2nd option is to implant a tube at the throat to help him breath.. It may cause him to have complications or infections.. Then he will be in the care of nursing home and she can't promise that the care there will be better than in hospital as the qualifications and experiences are different..

After much thinking and advice, my family decided to choose option 1 coz daddy had chosen this when he is still able to talk to us.. Somehow we are more prepared for this.. Deep down in me, I am scared.. But no matter what I will be strong de..

Henry came down to visit daddy.. Thanks for buying food and drinks.. After meeting with the doc, we went to have our late lunch and then went to office to give letter to my boss.. Then went IMM to walk walk.. Tried the fish spa.. Henry thanks for taking me out to relax awhile. Thanks for accompanying me and let me know u are always there when I am falling.. Thanks for being there when I really need a ear and opinion on how to decide.. Then Ling Ai, Nick, ZQ, JJ, Hailey and Gary came down in the night to visit dad.. Thanks all for coming.. Thanks u all for the care and all.. May all of u be bless.

Reached home, head feeling heavy.. Wonder is that how dad feels before he collapsed.. Aunt Sai Gin called to talk to me.. She saw how my hands tremble that day at the hospital and afraid I did not eat again.. Mum yest saw how I cried and scare I fainted.. I am sorry to make u all worry.. I am very sorry.. I will be strong and eat regulary.. I will not fall as I know mum and bro need me.. I may have a weak body but I will not fall so easily.. I will be fine.. I have to let go if not dad also will feel uneasy.. He should leave happy and not feel sad for us.. I will be strong and move on.. For the people around me to be happy, I will stay strong.. ^^



Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:30

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Day 4 in hospital

Daddy show slight improvement but doc said for him to wake up is still very low.. :(

Today my niece, Khartini, visited dad.. Asked how old is she now.. Hmm.. I dun think its nice to declare her age here.. She disturbed bro and me coz we are younger than her then for her to call us uncle and aunt makes her sound so young.. We tried to joke to perk up the atmosphere.. Aunt Irene, Aunt Martha, Aunt Sai Gin, Uncle Bok Chai and Aunt-in-law with Cousin Danny came to visit dad. Danny keep telling us he is the eldest grandchild in the family. We laughed as he said calling him uncle won't make Khartini sound younger as he is older than her.. Lol..

Well.. She is a lecturer in NP and bro gotten more arrow from her.. Haha.. Then we were like suaning her coz she can't speak chinese and hokkien.. Can't blame her though as she's a malay and her grandma is a chinese.. Haha.. Her grandma is my eldest aunt whom had passed on..

Hmm.. After that some of them left and only mum, bro, aunt martha and me.. We chatted and complaint.. I am utterly unhappy about some of the things.. I flare my temper at my aunts as they talk without showing gratitute. I shoot them off into their face.. Mum dozing off and Aunt Martha pulled out to shop.. Bro went out with friends and I am in hospital accompanying dad.. Not long later, Ling Ai and Florence came.. Chatted awhile and we talked about 2 person.. Continuing tml.. Then they went off.. Shortly they were off, 2nd uncle came.. Hehe.. I am not alone after all.. Hee..

Chatted with 2nd Uncle and his wife.. Hmm.. He asked what I have plans for dad if he wakes up.. How to take care of him all that.. Suggest to him and he agrees without second thoughts. But looking into my bank account.. I feeling depressed.. Its not easy to feed 3 mouths with such low pay.. Maybe I should take up more jobs like before.. Hospital bills I have no worries but daily expenses is what I worry.. Mum not working and bro still studying.. Its really burden.. Household expense its all on me.. I really need to think of an way out.. Uncles and Aunts pin high hopes on me as they know I have never fail them at all.. Burden.. But who understands..

Anyway.. I try to minimize my expenses as little as I could and give the best to my mum and bro.. I know my dad will wake up and well.. Looking forward to the day he open his eyes.. ^^

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:59

A Day I am afraid to Face

On 9 July 09 (闰五月十七), morning woke up as usual for work but I didn't go work. Woke up, saw my dad pacing up and down in the living room. His speech is unclear. I thought he sleep walking. Then I asked him what is he doing. He replied, his head feeling heavy and giddy. I was frighted. I asked me to go see doc, he said dun wan.. I repeated, he still say dun wan.. I asked him sit down, he said dun wan.. Then I went to wake my bro up, my bro hold his hand to persuade him to see doc.. He no response.. He start to shiver in cold.. I woke my mum up.. Tat time he starts to shiver throughout the whole body and unable to speak. His eyes is looking at us. I called up the ambulance. They took freaking long and they are not very gentle. Nowadays medics are really idiots. People sick and they people more sick. Kns de lo..

My mum went with the ambulance as only one person can follow. My bro and me took cab down. Not long we reached, the doc approached bro and me as mum was accompanying dad.. Then he said, he bringing my dad for brain scanning as he suspect that there might be internal bleeding in his brain. I am afraid and bro asking me to keep calm.

Not long later, the doc asked mum to come out and be with us. He brought him to do the scan and back. Not long the results are out. The doc gave a news which all of us is to be strong and accept. His main blood vessel which helps him to swallow food and breathe burst and no operation is able to help. I almost dropped but I told myself, I have to be there for my mum and bro. They need my support. For dad's sake, I not going to be afraid. I will be strong coz he had been telling me to be strong and dun need to scare for the past few days.

The neroulogist told us that my dad won't be able to wake up but I know my dad will.. I praying for miracles with my friends and relatives. My dad will get well de.. He so strong and always do what he thinks is impossible. I know he will wake up..

Daddy, do u hear me? Wake up from your deep sleep... We got a lot of family outings and overseas trips to go.. Not only the recent one but a lot......... Daddy, Please Wake Up.. I know U hear us everyday when we talk to u and hold your hands. I dun wan see slight improvement like what the doc tell me... I wanna see big improvement. Daddy, I know u can do it de.. Jia You!! I will always be there at your side to give u support with all your brothers and sisters.. They are also hoping to see u awake.. For all our sake, u must wake up and get well... Daddy, I really miss talking to u.. Please wake up and argue with me.. Like we always do.. Please Daddy......

On 10 July 09, the doc asked to see us at 2pm to review. That's where I got to know he got slight improvement but still we have to prepare for the worst. I cast that word out. My dad will be alright de.. My uncles and aunts are supportive. My dad fell ill and I saw their care for him. It touches me. My 2nd uncle told me to be strong anything dun need to worry. They will help.. I really felt something I am burden is lifted a little for me.. I need to thanks those friends who came to visit my dad and keeping him in your prayers. Even my long friends came. I really feel touched although a lot of things happen between us, u still let me know we are still the best of friends like what we are all along before things happen.. I am happy to know that I have friends who care..

Mum know all of my friends and she was so happy to see them coming.. Then she starts to say me for the first day having so many friends visiting and can fight with dad's friends.. I know mum was trying to be strong. I as her pillar will not collapse.. I know my uncles and aunts are worried for me as I am the weak one.. I fall sick easily and everything.. I gonna be strong and be there for my family.. Dun wan anyone to worry.. :)

Yest was rather quiet as sat.. Everybody have their own thing. Only we were there and dad's friends came and go.. Neighbours came.. I really felt happy that they remember the good of my dad.. Really grateful for all the food and all.. I thank them from the deepest of my heart..

Alright gonna prepare and head back to hospital to accompany my dad.. Blog again if there's something to update as my mood is really emo.. I have been crying for quite long.. My mum said my tears are like river coz its non-stop and I finally stop my tears but I know I tried to hold my tears.. I know my dad will be alright.. ^^ Today is the forth day my dad is in hospital.. I hope he wake up soon... ^^

Into A World of Emptiness @ 07:30

Sunday, July 5, 2009

RanDom (4 July & 5 July)

Yest went to Vivo as Cheng wanna buy phone.. Brought my parents to eat subway then shopped around..

Later in the evening meet JJ as I wanna shopped for my new Converse Shoe. Yes I gonna buy my denim.. Hehe.. I finally bought it after so many years of deciding and thinking.. Lol.. I forgot how many years.. Lol.. Think since the day I work in U2 until now ba.. Haha.. Anyway yest was a short hang out. Let's talk about today.. Hee

Today slept till quite late to wake up.. Then went to prepare and head to JB with JJ.. Hmm.. Its like being back home when I entered JB..

Went to buy food for Xiao Ah Gu and lunch for JJ and me.. Hungry from SG and till there then eat.. Everytime passby the park that full of my memories.. Haiz.. Its gone.. But memories is my heart and mind.. Hehe..

Slack at Xiao Ah Gu's shop as the sky is unfriendly today. Lol.. Was crapping most of the time.. I really enjoyed talking to Xiao Ah Gu.. Its always so much fun and laughter.. Hehe.. Aunty Nik hope I would go back often.. I wanna but sometimes I got think of dad and mum. Can I really go back for juz my weekends to spend time and such for myself? Finally I realize sometimes I muz really let go alittle so that I will know whether is it ok.. Maybe next weekend onwards, I will spend time in JB as dad and mum agreed. Hee.. They said somehow there's why I am belong. But they insisted I came over to SG to study as education level is better back in JB. I have nothing to deny as this is the fact.

I promise mum that I will try to get my licence soon so that weekends instead of staying in JB, I can drive her there too.. There's where mum belong. Her life was always there before she married my dad. Lol.. I know how much my mum wanna be in JB to spend time with her mum and siblings. Especially Ah Yi whom doesn't have a company during weekdays as Kor Kor and Wei is in SG studying and working. Uncle Mike had passed on. Her life change drastically.. But she managed to pull through alone.

There's a lot of changes in life.. Somehow today I realize that there more people around me need my care and concern more. I really hope I could give my time to them. Seeing them happy, I really happy le. I feel know what kind of life I want that will just make me happy. ^^

Then today in JB, I never met my friends before as u all know JB is not small lo.. People dun juz shop at City Square. I saw Debbie Tey as she juz got back from Malacca.. Lol.. So qiao!! I am surprize.. Lol.. Then next I saw my colleague Joyce when returning to SG.. Freaked out.. First time see people I know in JB.. Lol.. At custom sure will see but shopping mall is freaking hard.. Lol.. Alright.. At least tdy is a disaster at all as the rain didn't spoil my mood.. Hehe.. Hope everyone have happy weekends. Hehe..

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:30

Friday, July 3, 2009

Tired and Emo-ing

Today bought Mac breakfast to work. Late for 5 mins. Saw Pei Pei, Costing head whom also part of accounts.

Yest tried to sleep but I couldn't sleep. Then I realize people around me tends to be sarcastic or acting smart over something they dun even know. I now then know that when a person doesn't know anything keep trying to prove he/she is right which makes people rather pissed. Anyway I think sometimes talking to such people is really a pain in the vein.

Went lunch with Chew Hau and we crapped a lot today in office. Meeting is about the whole in the morning. I doing my work while having meeting. Trying to get my report done. Tomorrow going Vivo with my family then meeting Chew Hau to go Bukit Gombak. After that maybe head down to Bugis as I wanna see shoes.

Dunno wanna meet anyone a not coz a bit sian. I also going to buy comics to read at home since nothing much to do over this weekend. Hee.. Hmm.. Went to meet Ah Wei and Cheng to have dinner at Heeren. We played guessing game to see whose suggestion should take. Ah Wei suggest to eat Fish & Co, I suggested Waraku and Cheng suggested Japanese Food Street @ B1.. In the end, Ah Wei won so we went to eat Fish & Co. We ordered one seafood platter, one black pepper stingray, one baked salmon and their famous fish & chips. 3 of us but ordered 4 main course. Lol.. In the end, we manage to finish everything. Cheng grumble that he gonna put on weight. Wei and me goes, no matter how the 3 of us are still under weight lo. So his grumble is pointless. Lol..

After we finished our food and chatting away, then I realize the person who Wei is talking about is Joel. I turned and saw him at the counter asking for sweets.. Lol.. I didn't went up to say hi but head to the restroom instead. Lol.. Not we settled our bill then went to Takashimaya as Wei wanna buy personal hygiene stuff before we head back home.

Trained together and we parted upon reaching Raffles Place. As he heading back to NTU hostel, Cheng and me heading home. Talking about car and everything. Hmm.. Cheng and me will try to take our licence soon. But I have no confidence. Haha..

Hmm.. Kinda tired but I going to watch my drama show. Hee.. Been watching shows on Funshion.com this few days and I am getting hook to it. Lol..

Into A World of Emptiness @ 23:00

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Craps

My boss almost fainted when talking to me and Chew Hau today coz we were like crapping and she said that lucky she not old if not she will kanna heart attack.. Lol..

Today went to Clementi Central eat with Chew Hau. Bused there and cabbed back office. My boss cannot tarhan our crapping.. Haha.. Ate Subway but originally we planned to eat Mos coz we wanna drink Milk Shake..Haha..

Left office on the dot with Joyce. Freaking Company bus is packed. We took cabbed to Clementi. Lol.. She going for class.. Haha..

Today morning, a bad news came from my neighbour. Uncle Siva passed away this morning. I was shocked as I saw him yest like still healthy. Haiz.. Sometimes life is really unpredictable. Aunty was weeping when she asked for my mum as I was leaving hse for work. Rest in peace Uncle Siva. Living next door with him for 20 over years.. Its really nice knowing this old couple.

Told dad about next year cny fall on which day. Dad was like mad.. Nw only what month talk about cny liao. Then I told him boss asking when we wanna take leave. Dad then said take the same as previous year.

Sat I am going to say goodbye to my lousy lg phone as letting my bro to trade-in my phone. Postpone my phone buying to Sept. Hee.. I counting down the day to have SCV in my room and bro moving to a new room. Wahahaha.. Tomorrow meeting Ah Wei to eat dinner with bro. Hee.. Then sat I going to see shoes after accompanying my family. Hee.. Sun I still not sure.. Haha.. Can't wait for my weekends where I can take a short break. Hee.. Lastly, I am still feeling a little emo.. >.<

Into A World of Emptiness @ 22:30

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

sLeePy

Today went to work and suddenly there's a downpour. Lol.. I am the only one without umbrella. Hmm.. Its been always that I dun carry umbrella around. Even though I bought one long ago but I gave to away to people as I dun really use it. Haha..

Hmm.. Work is norm and tdy office was rather cold and quiet. I also dun have much mood to crap. Dun ask me why as I also not sure. Feeling emo this few days. Maybe Kor was right, I should heck a little. Since hanging out with my friends is ok for me then just do what I like coz I know where's my limits. He said let my friend say what he/she wanna say, its obviously its purely never understand me at all. Then he added and I could also be heck care to understand them.

Anyway some words spoken were in and deep down into my heart. It is obviously going around to tell me things and I am not that stupid but I try to be one coz there are a lot of things I chose not to know and never do I wanna know. But frankly speaking, those words are freaking hurtful. This few days I dun feel like talking and juz turn emo. Kor was cheering me up and hearing me saying things which I felt damn freaking annoyed.

A.T sorry that I dun wanna seek u for a listening ear but I think by now u know why coz KC told me that he told u abt it. Anyway I taking it to heart as I will never forget about it. I may not dislike or hate the person but I remember the hurtful words that was said. Its obvious its his/her thinking but not others but I will never say that person right into their face. I going to keep my cool and pretend there's nothing happen but I will never forget neither will I forgive. This person slowly is pissing me off by little but I trying to keep cool so far.

Anyway I slowly getting better. Thanks A.T for his concern and reminder to take my med though he knows how much I dislike to take med. Lol.. I am thankful that you are always letting me know that u are around although we are far apart. Even when I am going lunch, u accompany me to chat. I really had to say that for so many years, u are always there for me.. Thank u A.T!! Hee..

Hmm.. This is also good.. I tend to sleep early day by day.. Haha.. Blog early and sleep early. Weekends then sleep later. Lastly, I decided that evey Sun I will stay to rest and prepare for work on Mon if not it will be lethargic for me. Hee.. Hmm.. Some thoughts I keeping it down in my heart but Kor 2 more days, u are outstation again. Haiz.. Only a month later then can talk to u. Hopefully this 1 month would be smooth coz everytime u not ard, Po Po will nag into my ears. =.="

Hahahahaha.....

Into A World of Emptiness @ 21:00

| NuffNang |
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NaMe : ReNee

NicKnamE : PiGGie

AgE : 25

D.O.B : 03 ApRiL 1985

MSN : ariesgal_85@hotmail.com
Primary E-maiL : aries_renee_85@yahoo.com

Secondary E-mail : piggierenee@gmail.com

OccuPatioN : sLacKiNg

PriMary EducAtioN : Stamford Primary School (1992-1997)

SecoNdary EducAtioN : Gan Eng Seng School (1998-2001)

PosT-SecoNdary EducAtioN : ITE College Central (2002-2005)

Diploma : MDIS - Management Development Institute of Singapore (2007-2008)

Currently : MiSSing My DaDDy

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