Monday, June 22, 2009
Work then Movies
Today Andy msg me. He said no matter what I am thinking, he will respect. He said he knows I am waiting for someone but he hopes I could turn my eyes to look at him.
Haiz.. I had once turn my eyes on him but that was 5 years ago.. Now everything changes. The feelings can't be find back. Ya we still argue like last time. But I no longer living in last time. I moving forward. The past is being put down and I didn't look back at all..
Memories is worth to recollect but not worth to repeat again. I wonder he understands this ma. What been lost can't be retrieve de. What's been slowly build up and with a blow its back to a flat land. Everything just need to start from scratch. That's the reason why we have always been BFF and not further more.
I really not thinking about it. He is knows what I want and need, he did his best to fulfill it for me. Nothing he does let me feel sad. I only can appreciate deeply in my heart but the feeling is really gone. Its vexing as no one actually knows how I am feeling now. Its hardly be expressed through words. Haiz.. Can I juz let things be at it is.. Haiz..
Today work was smooth.. I crapped as per normal.. No one knows what the internal me is feeling. They juz sees my laughter.. I always like to differentiate my things evenly and I carry situation around to mix it with another situation.
Went to watch Ghost of Girlfriends Past. Its really GOOD to watch. I am once a heartless freak. Who dun bothers what is going to be happen to the people around. But somehow when I start to treasure, I feel PAIN...
Anyway I think let things go by its nature.. If there's a way, there's a solution. For my family, they try to hint every now and then.. Its time I shut their mouth. But first is to have a nice talk to Po Po before the rest knows what's call please shut yr bloody mouth and dun corrupt my thinking. The more they saying, I starting to doubt and its not really good... Please stop it.. I am really getting mad..
| 爱好 |
| 达成 |